Monday, September 27, 2010
But Koreans are no stranger to hair! I've seen countless mustaches and overgrown eye brows and nose hairs for days.
My students are AMAZED with my arm hair and try to "pet" it when I am trying to help them with their work. My girls constantly try to sneak up on me and run their dirty fingers through my hair. I AM NOT IMPRESSED! Nor am I some Waguk Barbie. I constantly have to tell them to keep their hands to themselves. I once asked my special needs co-teacher why my students are so enamored with my arm hair. " You know the Korean people ( as most Korean lies start off) are not hairy! We do not have hair like the foreigners" As her upper lip is weighed down by and extra-thick mustache. Korean men might not be hairy but the women sure are. At least foreign women have the sense to pluck, or wax mustaches instead of cake them with concealer.That is no bueno. The little mirror/comb combo thats seems to be so popular these days is not to comb your mustache or shape your eyebrows ladies. it's for your bangs. I've got an idea. Instead of little mirrors with combs Korean beauty stores should invest in developing little wax strip/lipgloss compacts. I'm sure they would sell like Spam kits during Chuseok!
Next time someone pets my arm hair like a dog or tries to finger F&%K my freshly styled coiff,I'm going to grab their little Korean mustache hairs and pull for dear life. Until next time...
Confucius say: When there are Korean claims of hairlessness beware. Because I'll be after your bushy top lip with a bottle of Nair!
Sunday, September 26, 2010
What's on the agenda for the Christmas party...egg nog, Christmas cookies and an S& M demonstration?
I love my friends...never a dull moment. Until next time...
Confucius says: To spice up a dinner party or next office picnic, pick up the next edition lesbian sex guide that shoul do the trick!
( I'm sure you wouldn't find this tip in Home Living or Martha Stuart)
Sunday, September 12, 2010
I am guilty of having the "Finch" syndrome of wanting to save "the deuce" for home. Most Koreans could care less and let it rip anywhere. But this was no time for "Finch". It was time for action! Me and my duck boots, a roll of toilet paper, and my fingers crossed, assumed the position. In minutes my frustration and angst were over. I have to tell you...it wasn't that bad.
That squat toilet may seem daunting but trust me people it's all bark and no bite.Could you imagine if it did? Needless to say I already asked my school to repair the Western toilet. I won't be making a habit of
"pooping a squat ". Crisis averted and all was calm in the jungle. Note to self: Caffeine + sugary breakfast treats are not my friends between the hours of 8:00am and 4:30pm. I hope this serves as a warning for my fellow expat teachers. Til next time!
Confucius say: When in doubt and one must squat! Be care where you aim or Deucie will be your new nickname!